January 20, 2013

• Xanga Coma

  I've been in a Xanga coma for nearly a month now.

  No idea why, really. I just go through phases where I have things I'd like to blog about and then I have phases where I look at the screen and stare, and then nod off, and then wake up, and then wipe off the drool, and then log off.

  Sometimes I think I'll get all political and post a link to the video of Jon Stewart talking about gun violence, and then I think "nah," Xanga is "my-opinion-land-and-to-hell-with-the-rest-of-you."  Not really a dialogue forum. But if you're looking for good traffic points, blast gay anything, gun control (pro or con), evangelical Christians or atheists, women's reproductive rights (pro or con), etc.  You'll find traffic.  As for me, I live on a dead end street, in a town with a dead end main street.  Traffic doesn't interest me.

  Sometimes I think I'll post about my work, and sometimes I do, but here's what my biggest frustration has been. Count how many words you get before you quit reading and move to the next paragraph.

  My recent training cycle to the operators includes a discussion as to when we have to have the Fuel Handling Air Exhaust Ventilation (FHAEV)fans running. Our Technical Specification states that they should be running anytime we move spent fuel assemblies in the auxiliary building. The basis is founded on the hypothetical drop of one assembly in the spent fuel pool (SFP) or transfer canal, not the drop of a cask holding the fuel. So, do we have to run the FHAEV fans when we are moving a cask of spent fuel within the auxiliary building, even if it's not in the spent fuel pool per se? I thought I had the answer, and piloted the class, but it wasn't until the about the third crew that I got the best accepted answer from our Regulatory Affairs department which, frankly would bore me to tears to write here. Suffice it say that we don't have to, because we have a crane that is designed to be single-failure-proof in accordance with NUREG some-number-or-another. Only when I had the lengthier explanation was I able to teach the remaining crews, and I also had to send an e-mail with said lengthier explanation to the previous crews with the original question.

   

  Hi!  How far did you get? Winner gets a Twinkie. Even if you made it all the way through, I'm guessing that's not top-blog material. Not that I care about traffic. Did I mention that they shoot fireworks at the end of my dead end street? It's fun, but the traffic is a drag.

  Did I mention that we think we've lost one of our spent fuel assemblies? It's possible that terrorists stole it and are planning on using it as part of a dirty nuke bomb to use against the anti-gun union who is responsible for shutting down Hostess and its Twinkies.  Not really, but you gotta think that would hit top blogs. All I need is a catchy title: "Twinkie Terrorists Nuke Gun Control Baker Unions."

  So how about my ministry work?  I really, really love that. After today's spirit-numbing laity Sunday church service on the topic of "joy" of which there was none in that building for that hour, I love my independent ministry work all the more. To be fair, I really enjoy most of the services. Today was a joy-killing exception. But, when I speak of my ministry work, I usually hear: "That's a nice thing you do."

   

  Translation: "Booooorrrrriinnngggg."

   

  Did I mention that the last weekend we took  a half-dozen nursing home residents on a plane ride so they could parachute out of the plane? It's a very progressive activities department. The tricky part was keeping the wheelchairs secure while in-flight. Eventually, we just decided to open the cargo door and put the plane in a climb. The chairs all rolled out in a beautiful formation. You can see it on YouTube if you search: Skydiving Seniors Pray and Pull."  Not really, but you can imagine the recs photos of that event would get!

  @JoyousWind gave me a remote control helicoptor for Christmas. I love it. The dog hates it. It's too cold outside to play with it. So what's a guy to do? Well .... that which all parents tell their kids they should NOT do - play with the toy inside. Hey - privilege of being a grown-up. What happens? The blades shred the window shade.

  Oops.

  So, I replaced the window shade. I also put up mini blinds in our bathroom. They look cool. I'd post a picture, but hey - who hasn't seen a pull-shade or mini-blinds?

  Did I mention that Miss Michigan stopped by our house on the way to the fireworks field at the end of our dead end main street? She needed a place to change into her show gown.  She couldn't figure out how to close the mini-blinds. I happened to be outside and noticed. I didn't take a picture, nor did I go blind. Not really, but you gotta admit, a post about going blind from peeping through mini blinds while Miss Michigan was changing clothes would be a high-traffic post.

  I could post about how my imaginary girlfriend who died  inspired me to be a top blogger, but I think that's been done.

  On a related note, I recently learned that "catfishing" doesn't always involve a fishing pole. Who knew?

  I could post about how much fun it was to be half-dressed and trying to get my barking dog to come into the house because he was afraid of the fallen trash bin, but everyone would just say: "Poor Boo."  or "Oh, how cute." Boo is evil. He needs neither sympathy nor attention. He needs to be groomed.

  I could post about how cool it will be when Peyton Manning wins the Super Bowl with the Denver Broncos, making his two Super Bowl wins with two different, but well-themed teams: Broncos and Colts.  Oh, that's right. The Broncos choked. Now we're curious if it will be the "Angry Birds Bowl."  (Falcons and Ravens)  Given the way the Falcons currently look like they're trying to throw away a 17 point lead, I doubt that will make blog fodder either.

  Staring.

  Nodding.

  ZZZZZzzzzz.....

  *Snrrk!!*  "I'M AWAKE!!"

  Ick.

  Excuse me. I need to find a napkin. There's drool all over my keyboard.

   

  • 6:03 pm
  • 12 Comments